.She cries all night.

Sometimes dreams arent sweet.

nobody@vox.com(Makyubex) — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 19:06:50 +0530

When my eyes opened I was already on the highway. It was cloudy, almost about to rain. I was riding the bike, it seemed. Yes, I was riding my bike. Going somewhere, still unaware of where to. But I kept riding. Soon enough I reached at the destination. Didn’t seem like much of a place. It did look oddly familiar though. Those who have lived in the city might have recognized the place as being similar to the parking space in front of Satyanagar market, only cleaner and modern looking.

Any ways, I parked the bike there and started to take off my helmet and sunglasses. However someone seemed to arrive from behind. I did not have a very good feeling about it. I did not take off my helmet just then. I moved ahead away from the parking. I checked out the person in the rear view mirror of a car. The person seemed very familiar. She removed her helmet as I looked back just for a second to confirm if it was whom I thought it was to be. I gasped and looked ahead again. I quickened my pace and soon enough I entered the building, there I removed my helmet and my two pairs of sunglasses. Well, I realized then that it was a dream.. No one wears two pairs of sunglasses on a cloudy day..

Some time later, I don’t know how much time exactly I came out of the building and walked to my bike. This time feeling much more confident since I had discovered it was a dream. She was still standing near her vehicle. But now she was not alone. A number of friends surrounded her. About 4 or 5. She was busy talking to them, I decided to make a swift exit. But just as I approached from behind a car, she raised a hand and waved. I stopped dead in my tracks. I raised a weak hand and reciprocated with a feeble wave of the hand. I was never good with my His and Byes. Someone always said that to me. Couldn’t really remember who.

Suddenly there was an odd sensation. The next moment a person coming from behind walk right though me towards the merry group waving to her. I was slightly taken aback, never the less was relieved to know I wasn't really there for her. Looking at her in the noisy group now, talking and laughing, I was happy. For some reason I felt inwardly content. As I reached my bike, instead of leaving, I lay down on it flat out and looked at the sky. It was cloudy, the backdrop was that of a grand cathedral, I had seen somewhere else. A few drops of rain fell on my face. But the sky was still clear. The laughter and talking grew in the background.

However, I couldn’t help the feeling. The cathedral was just an image, so was the sky. The sky and the cathedral began to fall in pieces revealing dark nothingness beyond. The rain had become stronger. The laughter died out. The world around me faded from view. In a flash, the realization dawned upon me.

Everything was fake.

Later.

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.In the diary of June.

nobody@vox.com(Makyubex) — Mon, 05 May 2008 02:51:00 +0530

The diary of jane

Breaking Benjamin

And something is still out of place. It is still the same as last time.
The place I searched for was not here. Was not there.

And yet something is amiss. I can feel it.
I Know my place. The last page in the diary of June. The tiny word scratched out at the bottom. Yea, that's me.

Had enough?

~~...Just h8 me .~~

Later.

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Yes. I know. Persistence needs Assurance.

nobody@vox.com(Makyubex) — Thu, 27 Dec 2007 17:27:19 +0530

The speaking tree says this.

O you, the one blessed with the black heart. All your heartfelt wishes shall be granted. But granted they shall be, by the devil.
If you so wish for yourself, you shall be cursed.

Even today when I look back at times past, I always have tried so hard not to wish for anything, not to expect. It comes true always, but the devil gives nothing for free, sigh*

I try hard to suppress my wishes, my dreams. But sometimes, I am just not in time to ...
yes, I persist, persist I do. But..even
Persistence needs assurance.

An assurance of a tomorrow. No, I dont want it to be bright or cheerful. Just another day tomorrow. Another day to live and to wish for a day after.

And another day after, and another.
Until a certain fairy tale comes true.

Just until then.

Later..

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Maybe that wasn't fair, But I guess I'll never know now.

nobody@vox.com(Makyubex) — Sat, 22 Dec 2007 14:36:05 +0530

A symphony in the air. A smell that is still lingering. An image that continues hovering.
You know what's that called? A memory. People call them mad who revel in the past.

No, I am not people. Neither mad, maybe slightly odd.
But that's debatable.

Path.

People hold grudges against those who wrong them. Hmm.
Maybe they dont see the other one's point of view. The other one who wronged them, but righted oneself in the process.

Maybe that wasnt fair to me, but..I guess I'll never know now

Hmm, just one last thing.
When you try to see through me, you dont know what you are looking for.
but when you do see me, you will hardly believe what you are looking at.

Later..

PS: Close your eyes. But dont be blind.

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Your wishes will bring destruction.

nobody@vox.com(Makyubex) — Thu, 04 Oct 2007 21:08:01 +0530

Win dain a lotica En val tu ri Si lo ta Fin dein a loluca En dragu a sei lain Vi fa-ru les shutai am En riga-lint
Win chent a lotica En val turi Silota Fin dein a loluca Si katigura neuver Floreria for chesti Si entina
Lalala Fontina Blu Cent De cravi esca letisimo Lalala De quantian La finde reve
Win dain a lotica En vai tu ri Si lo ta Fin dein a loluca En dragu a sei lain Vi fa-ru les shutai am En riga-lint Sora Shanti Snyder

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Immortal words.. .words I will never forget...

nobody@vox.com(Makyubex) — Sat, 01 Sep 2007 19:20:02 +0530

sometimes it happens that......you become dependent on some one for your happiness

sometimes it happens that...you become dependent on someone for your sadness...

sometimes it happens that you are fool enough to fall in love...

sometimes it happens that you decide to play with love...
thinking it is impossible to fall back from where i arose...

"sometimes" sometimes becomes "all the time"

{No, not me.
The above were spoken by someone, someone special..
But the person who said these knows not the mark they left..}

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